Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Advice Needed!

Smoke.  People inhale it.  People cough on it.   I love it.  Question is, what should the great Lama smoke?  That was not a rhetorical question, the concept of literary devices escapes me, that part of my brain is mostly resin and no longer functions, I need answers people. 

Reason why I need to find a "replacement reefer" is due to my recent legal trouble, and the fact that I'm going to be on probation.  Now, you may ask me, "Damn Lama, why don't you buy some jwh and call it a day?" Well, it just got banned in my state, so fuck you, unless you want to mail me some, in which case, by all means send it!

So I'm looking for smokable (vapable) herbs, that will give me some sort of psychoactive effects.  The only promising herb I've come up with is a Mexican botanical by the name of Sinicuichi. Does anyone have any experience with anything like this?  Comments please.  Pic related, it's sinicuichi

WANT OF THE DAY: Magic flight launch box

DO WANT!  You may ask, "Lama, why do you blog?"  To that I would respond: I am unemployed, due to goddamn school and the fact the Marquette, MI has 0 available jobs, also I need something to do, considering my probation is probably going to start in two days. 

I want a Magic Flight Launch Box really really bad, almost as badly as I want a job.  Help me attain my dream, keep supporting my little blog, and if you feel the kindness in your heart, then donate! Every little bit counts!  Remember, if you donate via paypal (on the front of my blog) I will receive this device sooner, otherwise I have to wait until this damn adsense check comes in, if it ever does... 

This is an amazing little Vaporizer, I can't vouch for it from personal experience, but I know for a fact that this is a spiffy little gadget.  One simply loads it with the herb of ones choice, closes the lid, and punches the battery into the side.  Almost immediately the little box that could fills up with delicious vapor, which the user may then inhale and enjoy. 

What will I do for donations?  NAME IT.

Video game revisitation of the month: Gameboy Advance!

Remember upgrading from your dinky Gameboy color, pocket, or brick to one of these beauties?  Oh how wonderful one's hands feel, when caressing the supple curves of a classic Gameboy Advance...  The first Nintendo handheld that utilizes bumpers, New, extra-wide high resolution screen, what's not to love?  Too often, classic platforms are tossed aside, great game titles displaced to the clearance bin or pawned off as a set for 5 dollars at a garage sale, this is why I have declared the remainder of September and October as Gameboy Advance revisitation month!  Some may find themselves lacking the necessary hardware to go about this project, to them I offer this wonderful little Gameboy emulator: http://www.emulator-zone.com/doc.php/gba/vboyadvance.html

Visualboy is great, gives you the feel of playing an advance, with the convenience of being right on your desktop, No AA's needed!  You can find free roms online, just fucking google it!

My first revisitation title:  Kirby Nightmare in Dreamland

Expect a review when I complete it.  If you have a title you'd like to see me play / review, leave a comment!  Don't forget to show some love!

W. A. Mozart's Invention: Music Piracy

Miserere, full name "Miserere mei, Deus" (Latin: "Have mercy on me, O God") by Italian composer Gregorio Allegri, is a setting of Psalm 51 (50) composed during the reign of Pope Urban VIII, probably during the 1630s, for use in the Sistine Chapel during matins, as part of the exclusive Tenebrae service on Wednesday and Friday of Holy Week. The service would start usually around 3AM, and during the ritual, candles would be extinguished, one by one, until one remained alight and hidden. Allegri composed his setting of the Miserere for the final act within the first lesson of the Tenebrae service.
It was the last of twelve falsobordone Miserere settings composed and chanted at the service since 1514 and the most popular: at some point, it became forbidden to transcribe the music and it was only allowed to be performed at those particular services, adding to the mystery surrounding it. Writing it down or performing it elsewhere was punishable by excommunication.[1] The setting that escaped from the Vatican is actually a conflation of verses set by Gregorio Allegri around 1638 and Tommaso Bai (also spelled "Baj"; 1650–1718) in 1714.

tl;dr:  The pope is a dick.  He had a wonderful piece of music written, and then told everyone that they couldn't listen to it!  So you know what good old Willy Mozart did?That motherfucker went to the sistine chapel to hear it performed, when home and transcribed it word for word.   Therefore, Mozart is now the king of TPB!  Mozart has successfully trolled the catholic church.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Thing of the day: Comedy Podcasts

Today I will talk about podcasts.  I sit on my ass alot, pretty much all day everyday.  I choose to sit on my for a few different reasons, trolling, lurking, WoW, blogging, fapping, etc etc etc.  All this idle time can make a body antsy, lest, of course, you are like me, and have lots of podcasts to listen to.  Now, my particular taste may not be the same for all, but I strongly suggest you go into the itunes podcast directory and find a few favorites of your own to support, but here's a brief list of come casts that I have enjoyed over the years.

Keith and the Girl:

abbreviated as KATG, is a popular comedy podcast that began on March 7, 2005. It is hosted by comedian Keith Malley and singer Chemda Khalili in Queens, New York. Chemda is of Persian descent whilst Keith's exact origins are unknown, but believed to be eastern European. In the show, which usually has a length of an hour or more, Malley and Khalili discuss their lives and current events in humorous and unrestrained fashion. As described by Keith and Chemda themselves in the show's tagline, "Keith and his ex-girlfriend talk shit".
Keith and The Girl has been able to consistently achieve a top-ten ranked podcast at Podcast Alley. The show has over 50,000 listeners and in excess of 1 million monthly downloads as of June 2008.  The show's media files are hosted on LibSyn/Wizzard Media, returning after a short period of being hosted on TalkShoe. The podcast's popularity has peaked at times to the 5,000th daily traffic rank according to Alexa. Recently they received the award for best Podcast in the Mature Comedy Category, and also People's Choice, for best Podcast of the year.

Red Bar Radio:redbarradio.com

 Red Bar Radio is a comedy talk radio show that “makes fun of everybody.” Host Mike David, along with comedian friends, harshly judge pop-culture and give their hilarious spin on everything around them. If you like shows such as Opie and Anthony, The Adam Carolla Podcast, Ron & Fez, or Keith and the Girl, Red Bar Radio may be another show to add to your list of favorites. Check out everything we have to offer by going to www.redbarradio.com

 Wreckless Media Radio:
Wreckless Media Radio is a comedy talk radio program that strives with every show to break down the walls of good taste, censorship, political correctness, and any other boundaries that plague today’s media.
Brian, Bryan, and Greg light up the mics every week with their own blend of mean spirited, twisted and sometimes sick humor.
Hosted by Brian Berris, a mentally unstable and perpetually sick and/or dying individual who broadcasts his lies, decet and hilarious commentary for the world to hear.  He is joined by his two co-hosts, Bryan Corpolongo, a wise beyond his years socialite, that takes great pride in his stuborn ways and distorted ideals and Greg Arevigian a sarcastic scholar who is riddled with ulcers, an infectious laugh that could bring the pope to tears, and a stunning hatred for all things human.  There has also been a rotating cast of equally jaded individuals who have been known to stop by. Brandon Boyer, a down on his luck, giant, who is constantly on the verge of suicide, and has a taste for blood. Jeff England, an encyclopedia of everything geeky, odd, and nostalgic.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Thing of the Day: My Car!

Kneel before her curvaceous plastic body, specially designed to be aerodynamic.  This baby gets 45-55 mpg, and the manual transmission gets even better.  I love mine because I'm a lazy bastard, and I don't really like pumping gas. 

Sexy as hell.

Feels like you're driving a goddamn sports car.

Awesome mileage.

Not great for the winter.

Slow acceleration.

To be honest... I kind of want to put ATV tires on it.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Donate to the Lama!

The Lama has recently been arrested for possession of marijuana, and is going to be in the need of funds.  If you feel kindness in your hearts, and would like to help he who will in turn help you, please, donate to my cause.  If you you donate to me, I can promise you this, I will:
Continue to show you love daily.
Continue to post articles of miscellany.
Continues to be your guru of green.
Who knows, I might buy a medical card and give you regular reefer reviews.
tl;dr! Donate button on front of blog! Show love please!

Question from the Lama!

So, ladies and gentlemen, how do I set one of these up?  I just set up a paypal account, and I have no idea how to set somethng like this up, or even how to receive money to my account.  I'm far too stoned to google it, so let's see some links or answers, or anything.  Please help me.

Thing of the Day: One-Hitters!

Today I would like to celebrate the innovation known as the One-Hitter.  I don't really know why it's called that.  I assume it's probably a baseball reference or something, but who fucking cares! These babies hit like a champ.  You can walk around smoking your shit stank, and when the authorities come a knockin', you are none other than the innocent tobacco smoker.  Ever wanted to inhale extremely hot, unfiltered smoke?  Do you like hot ashes in your teeth?  Then pick a One-Hitter up from your local headshop. 

Get high on very small portions of weed, very economical.

Control your usage, really makes you aware of every puff.


Damn cool.

Hot fucking smoke!

If you hit it too hard, you get hot ashes in your teeth, no fun...

Having to pack it every 30 seconds o.O

Feel free to leave comments on the Thing of the Day!

Thursday, September 23, 2010

College is Bullshit

College sucks.  Especially this piece of shit school.  I went here being promised a great education, specifically music education, but what I found at this poor excuse for a university was nothing but butthurt professors and a brain-dead student population.  Seriously though, 90 % of the faculty here is useless, you won't get a straight answer about shit. 

If anyone has some suggestions of good schools in Michigan for my particular major.  I was thinking UofM annarbor, they offer a bachelors in ethnomusicology.  I require input!

Celebrating: Dirt Weed!

Lets give it up for dirt weed, schwag, snicklefritz, or whatever the hell you may call it.  So for all you broke ass homeboys out there, give it up for brick weed.  When life gives you lemons, cough on some of this shit. 

You may ask the lama of love, "Why smoke this dirt, when for 10 dollars more you could smoke something worth smoking?"  Well, as a wise man once said, it's quantity, not quality.  I mean, there's tons of THC packed into that flat little nug. 

So, show some love for Cess!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Lets give it up for Ramen Noodles

From Wikipedia's article on "instant noodles" - "In the United States, the ubiquitous instant noodle product is known as ramen, after the Japanese dish on which it is based, and it comes in a variety of mostly meat-based flavors. Common flavors in the United States include chicken, pork, beef, mushroom, shrimp, roast beef, roast chicken, chili, chili lime, and "oriental". Other flavors, including shoyu, miso, and kimchi, are also available at supermarkets and convenience stores. The three major brands are Nissin Top Ramen, Maruchan Ramen, and Sapporo Ichiban. Thailand's "Mama" brand is also quite common in the U.S. Ramen noodles are extremely popular among college students, due to their low cost and ease of preparation."

So you know what time it is, everyone show some love for Ramen noodles, for keeping us alive in times of poverty.  Whether it be chicken, shrimp, beef, cheddar, etc. etc. keep eating these sodium death cubes. 

Strain Review: Fruity Pebbles

Fruity Pebbles
This is Fruity Pebbles.  I didn't take this photo, but it's the same stuff.  Awesome head high, no couch-lock, gives you tons of energy, etc. etc.  Buy some of this, you will not regret it.  Possibly it's most distinctive feature is its aroma, which is very sweet, fruity, delicious.  If you are a vaporizer user, it's fruity taste will make your head explode.  Seriously though,  it's a bit pricey, $25 a gram, but you will be pleased. 

My Iolite Vaporizer Review

This is the Iolite vaporizer.  Kneel before it's high quality medical / cooking quality plastic.  You are looking at one of the best portable personal vaporizers available right now.  Fill up the herb chamber with your selection of finely chopped herb, fill up the propane tank, and get ripped. 
I picked one of these up recently from my local headshop for $250, which is a bit pricey, but this baby was worth every penny and more.  It is about the size of an iPhone and about the width of two iphones, and the only sound it makes is a gentle static sound as the flameless-catalytic engine vents exhausted butane.  One tank full of butane will run the device for about 1.5-2 hours, which, believe me, is a hell of a session with the Iolite. 
Pros of the Iolite personal vaporizer:
  Extremely stealthy, you could even take this baby into a movie theater.

Conserves bud.

Brings out the flavors of your herbs.

Very portable.

If your Iolite ever breaks down, the customer service is awesome.

Slightly awkward to pack.

Slight learning curve.

Can be a hassle to fill.

Temperamental if you use the wrong grade of butane. 

Important note:  ONLY use butane at least 4x-5x refined, such as vector.  The ignition system in mine actually failed because I used poor quality butane. 

Jwh-018 / Herbal smoke blends.

From wikipedia:  "Synthetic cannabis is a herbal and chemical product which mimics the effects of cannabis. It is best known by the brand names K2[1] and Spice[2]. When synthetic cannabis products first went on sale it was thought that they achieved an effect through a mixture of legal herbs. Laboratory analysis in 2008 showed this was not the case and that they in fact contained synthetic cannabinoids which act on the body in a similar way to cannabinoids naturally found in cannabis, such as THC. Synthetic cannabinoids, including cannabicyclohexanol, JWH-018, JWH-073, and HU-210, are used in an attempt to avoid the laws which make cannabis illegal, making synthetic cannabis a designer drug. It has been sold under various brand names, online, in head shops and at some gas stations. It is marketed as an incense or "herbal smoking blend", but the products are usually smoked by users. Although synthetic cannabis does not produce positive results in drug tests for cannabis, it is possible to detect its metabolites in human urine. The synthetic cannabinoids contained in synthetic cannabis products have been made illegal in many European countries, but remain legal under federal law in the USA and Canada. Several US states have made it illegal under state law."

Waido Bushi

Awesome amami song.  Okinawa Sanshin. Waido Bushi